Stockholm's Daughter by Rio Mahawan

Scrolling on Tiktok, being told I am turning into my father.
Sitting in my car,
my eyes well up,
realizing I have class in 30 minutes.

Working a full time job, struggling to make ends meet
Living under my mom’s house,
she made dinner just enough for her and my sister
“Hey Siri, where can I eat?”

Scrolling on Tiktok, being told I am turning into my father.
Realizing I did inherit his anger.
Sitting in my car, I’m holding my head in my hands.
Realizing I have class in 20 minutes.

Scrolling on Tiktok, being told I am turning into my father.
I only have myself,
but I’m no one’s favorite daughter

… not even my father’s.

Scrolling on Tiktok, being told I am turning into my father.
My abuser, but also my favorite hug.
Realizing he doesn’t hug me anymore,
I don’t see him anymore,
he doesn't call me anymore,
is it his new lover?

Anger, sadness, endless roller coaster.
I PUNCH MY FUCKING STEERING WHEEL.

Scrolling on Tiktok, being told I am turning into my father.
Alone in my car,
shirt is damp with whatever’s left to cry,
realizing I have class in 5 minutes–I remember when I was five.

When he hurt me the first time.

The world was cruel at that young age of mine.

I’m all alone, ruined by my father,
Scrolling on Tiktok realizing I am my father’s daughter.